A lawyer friend of mine recently shared with me the instructions a jury is given prior to a trial:
A reasonable doubt is a doubt that exists and may arise from the evidence or lack of evidence. It is such a doubt as would exist in the mind of a reasonable person after fully, fairly, and carefully considering all of the evidence or lack of evidence. If, from such consideration, you have an abiding belief in the truth of the charge, you are satisfied beyond a reasonable doubt.
How does being satisfied beyond reasonable doubt translate to faith? This same friend, who is a prosecuting attorney, talked about reasonable doubt being like a puzzle. She gave the example of a puzzle with a lot of pieces and some of those pieces are missing. She invited me to think of a puzzle that is a picture of a barn. If, without looking at the picture on the box, you can tell it’s a barn, even if there a pieces missing, you probably have enough evidence to make a decision. She pushed back on her own analogy by acknowledging that pieces missing here and there are a lot different than if an entire section of the puzzle is missing, wherein the whole picture is compromised and it is difficult to determine the bigger picture. Bottom line: in the legal realm as it is with faith, certainty is not always attainable, nor is it the ultimate goal. Rather, seeing past circumstantial evidence and seeing the big picture (abiding belief in the truth) is the goal.
When we consider God’s covenant and steady relationship with Israel do we count it as evidence of God’s love? When we think of the grand positives of the Mosaic law do we count it as evidence of God’s love? When we consider the life, death and resurrection of Jesus do we count it as evidence of God’s love? While at times in our faith there are pieces missing and pieces that don’t seem to fit, can we see the big picture of a loving God that seeks unfiltered relationship with God’s creation?
It brings to mind Paul’s words in one of the most beloved chapters of the Bible, 1 Corinthians 13: “For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.”
There are enough pieces to sustain my faith that God’s love for me is real. While I long to see and know the fullness of the picture of grace, compassion and love of God found in Jesus, I can see enough of the picture to give me great hope.
Friday, October 30, 2009
Friday, October 16, 2009
Doubters Anonymous: Suggested Reading
Here are some resources for those doing extra reading to follow up on our current Inn series, "Doubters Anonymous: Seeking Faith over Certainty."
The Myth of Certainty by Daniel Taylor
Faith & Doubt by John Ortberg
Disappointment with God by Philip Yancey
Miraclesby CS Lewis
Faith & Doubt: An Anthology of Poems by Patrice Vecchione
God in the Dark: The Assurance of Faith by Os Guinness
Beyond a Shadow of a Doubt by Os Guinness
Dark Night of the Soul by St. John of the Cross
The Cloud of Unknowing (Anonymous)
Confessions by St. Augustine
The Myth of Certainty by Daniel Taylor
Faith & Doubt by John Ortberg
Disappointment with God by Philip Yancey
Miraclesby CS Lewis
Faith & Doubt: An Anthology of Poems by Patrice Vecchione
God in the Dark: The Assurance of Faith by Os Guinness
Beyond a Shadow of a Doubt by Os Guinness
Dark Night of the Soul by St. John of the Cross
The Cloud of Unknowing (Anonymous)
Confessions by St. Augustine
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
Expectation = Doubt
When it comes to questions about faith and doubt, the one that always arises for me is “why?” Not, “Why does God work in the way that God does,” but “Why do we have such a tendency to doubt that God is at work, and will be at work to carry through.?”
Recently, I was reading Ordering Your Private World by Gordon MacDonald, and he partially blames this tendency to doubt God’s promises on our expectations. And not just normal human expectations, but the expectations that we have in America because of the fact that we were born and raised in America. In reference to God’s promises to answer our prayers, he writes:
We live in a society that is reasonably organized. Put a letter in the box, and it usually ends up where you want it to go. Order an item on the Internet, and it usually comes to you in the right size, color, and model. Ask someone to provide you a service, and it is reasonable to expect that it will work out that way. In other words, we are used to results in response to our arrangements. That is why prayer can be discouraging for some of us. How can we predict the result? We are tempted to abandon prayer as a viable exercise and to try getting the results ourselves.
This observation resonated with me when it comes to the doubts that I have about the promises of God. My expectations are based solely on what I have come to expect in this human world, and I tend to place God in that box. When I don’t see the results I desire, I doubt that God will follow through, or has already followed through as the case can sometimes be.
This reminds me of experiences in other countries, where the values and expectations of the culture are completely different from my own. When standing in a queue isn’t the standard mode of operation, but rather people sort of mob toward whatever it is they are waiting for, I have stood there flabbergasted (and irritated) that this is the way things work. Of course, my culture knows the “right way” to make things work!
Isn’t that how we approach our faith in God and God’s promises? One wonders if the limitations we place on God are causing our own faith to remain stagnant and narrow. What would happen if we could remove our human tendencies to expect God to fit into the culture that we come from, and instead, allow God to blow our expectations out of the water?
Posted by Janie Stuart
Recently, I was reading Ordering Your Private World by Gordon MacDonald, and he partially blames this tendency to doubt God’s promises on our expectations. And not just normal human expectations, but the expectations that we have in America because of the fact that we were born and raised in America. In reference to God’s promises to answer our prayers, he writes:
We live in a society that is reasonably organized. Put a letter in the box, and it usually ends up where you want it to go. Order an item on the Internet, and it usually comes to you in the right size, color, and model. Ask someone to provide you a service, and it is reasonable to expect that it will work out that way. In other words, we are used to results in response to our arrangements. That is why prayer can be discouraging for some of us. How can we predict the result? We are tempted to abandon prayer as a viable exercise and to try getting the results ourselves.
This observation resonated with me when it comes to the doubts that I have about the promises of God. My expectations are based solely on what I have come to expect in this human world, and I tend to place God in that box. When I don’t see the results I desire, I doubt that God will follow through, or has already followed through as the case can sometimes be.
This reminds me of experiences in other countries, where the values and expectations of the culture are completely different from my own. When standing in a queue isn’t the standard mode of operation, but rather people sort of mob toward whatever it is they are waiting for, I have stood there flabbergasted (and irritated) that this is the way things work. Of course, my culture knows the “right way” to make things work!
Isn’t that how we approach our faith in God and God’s promises? One wonders if the limitations we place on God are causing our own faith to remain stagnant and narrow. What would happen if we could remove our human tendencies to expect God to fit into the culture that we come from, and instead, allow God to blow our expectations out of the water?
Posted by Janie Stuart
Thursday, September 17, 2009
Reflecting on Reflecting
In preparation for the fall speaking series at the INN, I’ve started reading a book from Daniel Taylor called The Myth of Certainty: The Reflective Christian and the Risk of Commitment. It’s caused me to reflect on reflecting.
It seems that we are all asking questions of identity. Who am I? It’s the question that college students ask and a question that I continue to ask as I anticipate creeping up on the time that is traditional for a mid-life crisis. Taylor says, “Reflectiveness is a character trait deeply rooted in what one essentially is. It helps define one’s fundamental experience of reality. The life of a reflective person is more likely to be interesting, less likely to be serene; more likely to be contemplative, less likely to be active; more likely to be marked by the pursuit of answers, less by finding them. The result is a high potential for creativity, curiosity, and discovery but also for paralyzing ambivalence, alienation, and melancholy.”
Psalm 119 encourages us to mediate on the Lord’s Precepts and the Lord’s exhortation to consider the lilies of the field (Mt. 6:28). This encouragement is an invitation into the tension of the reality we live in. Reflection is a risk/reward endeavor. It leads us into the mystery of questions that can and never will be answered. When we get consumed with getting the right answer, we miss the pursuit of the question. For good reason: the pursuit of answers is difficult because it is filled with tension.
But the Christian faith invites us to consider the tension of seeing opposites: the first being last (Mt. 19:30), the physical and spiritual (Gen. 1), dying to live (Luke 14:27). Part of the journey as people seeking union with Jesus is thoughtfully pursuing these answers, not just getting the answer in a well-packaged sermon. We meditate, reflect, struggle, doubt, question, discuss, wonder and celebrate this pursuit individually and in community. We struggle because we are seeking to reimagine who we are as Children of God and seeking to discover more of the mystery of God. On this journey, we get the sense that God is bigger and more loving than we thought.
So this fall I invite the community around University Ministries to reflect. I challenge you to engage the tension present in your faith and think for yourself as we seek a bigger expereince with the grace of God revealed in Jesus Christ.
It seems that we are all asking questions of identity. Who am I? It’s the question that college students ask and a question that I continue to ask as I anticipate creeping up on the time that is traditional for a mid-life crisis. Taylor says, “Reflectiveness is a character trait deeply rooted in what one essentially is. It helps define one’s fundamental experience of reality. The life of a reflective person is more likely to be interesting, less likely to be serene; more likely to be contemplative, less likely to be active; more likely to be marked by the pursuit of answers, less by finding them. The result is a high potential for creativity, curiosity, and discovery but also for paralyzing ambivalence, alienation, and melancholy.”
Psalm 119 encourages us to mediate on the Lord’s Precepts and the Lord’s exhortation to consider the lilies of the field (Mt. 6:28). This encouragement is an invitation into the tension of the reality we live in. Reflection is a risk/reward endeavor. It leads us into the mystery of questions that can and never will be answered. When we get consumed with getting the right answer, we miss the pursuit of the question. For good reason: the pursuit of answers is difficult because it is filled with tension.
But the Christian faith invites us to consider the tension of seeing opposites: the first being last (Mt. 19:30), the physical and spiritual (Gen. 1), dying to live (Luke 14:27). Part of the journey as people seeking union with Jesus is thoughtfully pursuing these answers, not just getting the answer in a well-packaged sermon. We meditate, reflect, struggle, doubt, question, discuss, wonder and celebrate this pursuit individually and in community. We struggle because we are seeking to reimagine who we are as Children of God and seeking to discover more of the mystery of God. On this journey, we get the sense that God is bigger and more loving than we thought.
So this fall I invite the community around University Ministries to reflect. I challenge you to engage the tension present in your faith and think for yourself as we seek a bigger expereince with the grace of God revealed in Jesus Christ.
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
What about Kissing during dating? Is it okay to passionately kiss someone you’re dating?
If we were living during the time of the early church, we would see a lot more kissing go on. It was part of the standard greeting between people that were in community. I think it is appropriate to express physical affection while you are dating. The physical aspect of attraction is one part of attraction alongside emotion, spiritual and intellectual. I certinaly don’t hear any kissing embargo in the Bible.
That said, kissing or any of the physical aspects of relatoinship need to line up with the emotional, intellectual and spritual aspects as well. Not that these four components will always be totally equal, but they need to be close. For example, if you are making out with someone but cannot have any sort of intelligent conversation where one person is actually listening and interested in the other, then back off the physical.
One popular conservative critique of kissing is that it works much like a gateway drug. That is to say, it’s called first base for a reason and it’s never the goal to stay at first base. However, I tend to think that we are capable of being able to exercise self disipline in this manner, but we do so understanding that self-discipline is difficult. We are animals, yes, but we’re people capable of moving beyond mere instinct.
Ultimately, I think I would encourage young couples to talk more about what they expect physically including naming the boundaries that each wants to honor in a dating relationship. If you talk about your physicaI relationship with other people, but not with the person you’re dating, perhaps an indication that things are off emotionally and/or otherwise. I think talking more about expectations in the phyiscal aspect of relationship allows for a freedom that’s appropriate proactively, instead of getting carried away in any given moment on the couch.
So, go ahead and kiss, show affection to this person that you are getting know on several different levels, but be okay with the single in the courting stage of a relationship, instead of swinging for the fences. And be sure that physical aspect of your relationship is one that you are dialoguing about and that is going at an equal pace with the rest of your relationship.
That said, kissing or any of the physical aspects of relatoinship need to line up with the emotional, intellectual and spritual aspects as well. Not that these four components will always be totally equal, but they need to be close. For example, if you are making out with someone but cannot have any sort of intelligent conversation where one person is actually listening and interested in the other, then back off the physical.
One popular conservative critique of kissing is that it works much like a gateway drug. That is to say, it’s called first base for a reason and it’s never the goal to stay at first base. However, I tend to think that we are capable of being able to exercise self disipline in this manner, but we do so understanding that self-discipline is difficult. We are animals, yes, but we’re people capable of moving beyond mere instinct.
Ultimately, I think I would encourage young couples to talk more about what they expect physically including naming the boundaries that each wants to honor in a dating relationship. If you talk about your physicaI relationship with other people, but not with the person you’re dating, perhaps an indication that things are off emotionally and/or otherwise. I think talking more about expectations in the phyiscal aspect of relationship allows for a freedom that’s appropriate proactively, instead of getting carried away in any given moment on the couch.
So, go ahead and kiss, show affection to this person that you are getting know on several different levels, but be okay with the single in the courting stage of a relationship, instead of swinging for the fences. And be sure that physical aspect of your relationship is one that you are dialoguing about and that is going at an equal pace with the rest of your relationship.
Friday, July 10, 2009
How can I stop looking at porn? Sex is tough but porn can be harder to get away from. Any advice?
Response to texted question on dating from May 12.
Tough one. If I had a nice tidy answer to this one, I’d be a millionaire.
In terms of the questions that were texted to us in our series at the INN, it seems that no one was seeking to justify porn as a good thing or even neutral. There seems to be a common understanding of the twistedness of porn (btw…that’s what the Greek word means, “twisted”), at least by the folks that attend the INN. Given that, let me see if I might offer some life-giving advice.
First, to the degree that it is possible, I encourage you to take captive the thought by the power that is found simply in the name of Jesus. Per a book by Neil Anderson, The Bondage Breaker, I would encourage you to call upon the power of the resurrection when you discover the overwhelming desire toward porn, masturbation and premarital sex by simply saying a prayer that may sound like, “In the name of Jesus, I take captive that thought.” If we desire to overcome a draw toward porn and the like, I believe we must believe that God is with us and wants to be with us and has the power to help us in that struggle.
Second, and similar, remembering that you are forgiven and that this sin (or any other) does not have to define you. The grace of God does. God gets the final and decisive word on our identity and that is a word of grace, mercy and love. Too often, I see people get bogged down in the shame of the struggle of pornography and it paralyzes them in their ability to interact in other relationships, in ministry, in faith and simply life in general. Don’t let the enemy have this victory. We don’t surrender to our sickness, we celebrate our healer.
Now, I know that those first two may sound kind of trite, but, because this is such a complex issue, it is a place to start that opens us to the reality of God’s grace in our lives.
Third, bring it into the light. Confess to a community. The more we can keep this from being our dirty little secret, the better the opportunity to experience Christ’s power in the struggle. The longer this stays in the dark, the more potential there is for one to be convinced that this is not a problem. I’m very confident in saying that when you confess with a person or group that you trust, that loves you, you will most likely hear, “you are not alone.” Allow your community to support you. This brings honesty to the equation: to yourself and to your community. Most likely, your community will be blessed (and perhaps relieved) by that honesty.
Fourth, create a plan. Often going “cold turkey” from porn doesn’t work. One strategy is that you seek to corral it and put boundaries around it. I might sound like a bit of a heretic here, but I’m confident of what I’m pointing to. Here is what I’m getting at: If you are looking at porn every day and seeking to stop, why don’t you pick one day in the next week that you don’t look at porn. Then maybe the next week do two days. You get the direction I’m headed. The idea is to eliminate it completely from your life. Here’s the catch: I think this plan only works if you are sharing this with community. People need to support you and hold you accountable in it. Make a pact with your small group. Agree to call each other when you are tempted. Commit to praying for each other as you engage the struggle.
Finally, take extreme measures. Get a filter on your computer (see XXXchurch.com for resources) or eliminate it all together. Jesus exaggerates this point in the Sermon on the Mount when he asks listeners to consider their right hand. “And if your right hand causes you to stumble, cut it off and throw it away.” (Mt. 5:30) Whatever it is that is leading us away from Christ, we should seek to purge and remove. This is at the heart of Christian spirituality, dying to ourselves and seeking union with the living, loving, gracious God that is eager to be with us in Jesus Christ.
Tough one. If I had a nice tidy answer to this one, I’d be a millionaire.
In terms of the questions that were texted to us in our series at the INN, it seems that no one was seeking to justify porn as a good thing or even neutral. There seems to be a common understanding of the twistedness of porn (btw…that’s what the Greek word means, “twisted”), at least by the folks that attend the INN. Given that, let me see if I might offer some life-giving advice.
First, to the degree that it is possible, I encourage you to take captive the thought by the power that is found simply in the name of Jesus. Per a book by Neil Anderson, The Bondage Breaker, I would encourage you to call upon the power of the resurrection when you discover the overwhelming desire toward porn, masturbation and premarital sex by simply saying a prayer that may sound like, “In the name of Jesus, I take captive that thought.” If we desire to overcome a draw toward porn and the like, I believe we must believe that God is with us and wants to be with us and has the power to help us in that struggle.
Second, and similar, remembering that you are forgiven and that this sin (or any other) does not have to define you. The grace of God does. God gets the final and decisive word on our identity and that is a word of grace, mercy and love. Too often, I see people get bogged down in the shame of the struggle of pornography and it paralyzes them in their ability to interact in other relationships, in ministry, in faith and simply life in general. Don’t let the enemy have this victory. We don’t surrender to our sickness, we celebrate our healer.
Now, I know that those first two may sound kind of trite, but, because this is such a complex issue, it is a place to start that opens us to the reality of God’s grace in our lives.
Third, bring it into the light. Confess to a community. The more we can keep this from being our dirty little secret, the better the opportunity to experience Christ’s power in the struggle. The longer this stays in the dark, the more potential there is for one to be convinced that this is not a problem. I’m very confident in saying that when you confess with a person or group that you trust, that loves you, you will most likely hear, “you are not alone.” Allow your community to support you. This brings honesty to the equation: to yourself and to your community. Most likely, your community will be blessed (and perhaps relieved) by that honesty.
Fourth, create a plan. Often going “cold turkey” from porn doesn’t work. One strategy is that you seek to corral it and put boundaries around it. I might sound like a bit of a heretic here, but I’m confident of what I’m pointing to. Here is what I’m getting at: If you are looking at porn every day and seeking to stop, why don’t you pick one day in the next week that you don’t look at porn. Then maybe the next week do two days. You get the direction I’m headed. The idea is to eliminate it completely from your life. Here’s the catch: I think this plan only works if you are sharing this with community. People need to support you and hold you accountable in it. Make a pact with your small group. Agree to call each other when you are tempted. Commit to praying for each other as you engage the struggle.
Finally, take extreme measures. Get a filter on your computer (see XXXchurch.com for resources) or eliminate it all together. Jesus exaggerates this point in the Sermon on the Mount when he asks listeners to consider their right hand. “And if your right hand causes you to stumble, cut it off and throw it away.” (Mt. 5:30) Whatever it is that is leading us away from Christ, we should seek to purge and remove. This is at the heart of Christian spirituality, dying to ourselves and seeking union with the living, loving, gracious God that is eager to be with us in Jesus Christ.
Thursday, June 11, 2009
How do you renew purity and become right with God after giving your virginity away?
Great question. Because we live in such a sexually-charged culture, there is this perception that one is permanently marked as “impure” after having sex for the first time. While the dynamics may be different it seems that as a culture we have not come much further than Nathaniel Hawthorne’s Victorian Classic, The Scarlet Letter. Particularly within the church, we are even further behind in how we talk about sex and purity. I hope this can change.
Becoming right with God is an endless and exhausting endeavor. In fact, I’ve never met anyone that can get right with God whether they have had sex or not. It’s a bit bewildering why our churches don’t make a bigger deal about lying, cheating, stealing or stewarding our money, but churchgoers often hop on this bandwagon of ultra-condemnation io someone who has sex before they are married. The reality is that sin makes it impossible to be right with God, regardless of what the sin is. On our own we cannot become pure or get right with God. That’s the bad news. The Good News is that the story of the God revealed to us in Jesus Christ is a story about a God that welcomes his children back over and over again. We discover a God that gets down on his knees and washes the feet of the ones he loves. We do not make ourselves right with God; it is Jesus, his life, sacrifice and glorious resurrection that make us right with God. Our job is to trust and believe that such love is genuinely for us. Even those of us that have made mistakes sexually.
God is dying (and in fact has died!) to free you of the guilt and shame that so often comes along with such sin. The church is in need of repenting for perpetuating such guilt and shame. When we believe that we are loved, forgiven and purified by a God who seeks relationship with us, we begin to change. Our decision to follow Christ might be a one-time deal, but the whole idea of transformation and purification is an ongoing process. Scripture tells us of a woman caught in adultery that Jesus does not condemn. He does however encourage her to start anew and sin no more. In the story you get the idea that Jesus’ great hope for this woman is that she would never find herself in that position again -- a position driven by guilt, judgment and condemnation.
In Christ we are a new creation, only by the work that Jesus has accomplished. Our job is to simply believe that it is a love for us that we are to share with others. That is what purifies us.
Becoming right with God is an endless and exhausting endeavor. In fact, I’ve never met anyone that can get right with God whether they have had sex or not. It’s a bit bewildering why our churches don’t make a bigger deal about lying, cheating, stealing or stewarding our money, but churchgoers often hop on this bandwagon of ultra-condemnation io someone who has sex before they are married. The reality is that sin makes it impossible to be right with God, regardless of what the sin is. On our own we cannot become pure or get right with God. That’s the bad news. The Good News is that the story of the God revealed to us in Jesus Christ is a story about a God that welcomes his children back over and over again. We discover a God that gets down on his knees and washes the feet of the ones he loves. We do not make ourselves right with God; it is Jesus, his life, sacrifice and glorious resurrection that make us right with God. Our job is to trust and believe that such love is genuinely for us. Even those of us that have made mistakes sexually.
God is dying (and in fact has died!) to free you of the guilt and shame that so often comes along with such sin. The church is in need of repenting for perpetuating such guilt and shame. When we believe that we are loved, forgiven and purified by a God who seeks relationship with us, we begin to change. Our decision to follow Christ might be a one-time deal, but the whole idea of transformation and purification is an ongoing process. Scripture tells us of a woman caught in adultery that Jesus does not condemn. He does however encourage her to start anew and sin no more. In the story you get the idea that Jesus’ great hope for this woman is that she would never find herself in that position again -- a position driven by guilt, judgment and condemnation.
In Christ we are a new creation, only by the work that Jesus has accomplished. Our job is to simply believe that it is a love for us that we are to share with others. That is what purifies us.
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